Monday, April 04, 2005
why
wonder why i care too much,
wonder why it got this way
i glanced retrospectively
wonder why i get afflicted,
wonder why i love too much
i saw no reasons, condemning such nature
wonder why i get perplexed,
wonder why i am so alone
now leave me alone, like you always did
wonder why i am unhappy,
wonder why you detest me so
was i the blackened sponge?
was i an irritating, nagging rusted dagger in that poked too deep?
were you sickened by my horrid nature?
was i an object of disgust, a pathetic being which lingered like a parasite, gripping you too much, you could hardly breathe?
was i impeding you, in your quest, your freedom of expressions, of liberation?
was i the red traffic light which stopped you from finding your true self?
was i the one who preached too well, too well, too well?
were the things i said a blatant folly, gibberish of misinterpretations?
do wish to say, "get out of my life, myra"
do i appear to you as a foil?
do i make you feel worse in life, than it already is?
do you know i care?
do you know i cared too much, it hurts?
do you know i asked for nothing in return?
do you?
all i did was to care, to hold something nice. no intention of posession.
if it helps you get on with your life, i will go. Like I should, the first time you told me to.
i will learn not to care, not to love, not to share, if it helps helping you.
Myra Abd Kadir~ at 19:23
