Sunday, July 30, 2006
28 th July: Steppin A Year into AdultHoooood...
I was in a rush friday mornin, I missed JC phone call and I sure missed the 8am train to school. Damn, its my birthday!! Hahah, somehow I had a mixed feelin of both joy and pain, but what I do know Friday was going to be a darn long day... not because its my birthday.. but because I already have things to fulfil for that friday, like any other fridays.. School, tuition arabic homework and arabic classes.. "ok ok, myra. u have responsibilities... perform it!" I trained myself to stuff my emo, troubling thoughts about ageing. The time passed and until I know it, the euphoria that I usually had on my many birthdays, disappeared. It vanquised. To much of my surprise...! When I was younger, I always told myself.. I would refrain from bein as
listless as adults, as
egoistic as adults, as
boring as adults and as
pessimistic/cynnical (though realistic) as adults... but HEY..I am that Adult. And that was when I realised, I was numbed by ageing. I couldnt perserve that innocence of being unjudgemental, patient and accommodating. School esp in SMU has taught me to fight fight fight! Work has taught me to focus focus focus! And life has told me to work work work. Whoa... scary.. I am the Adult I never wanted myself to be.
But of course, its fortunate I have people around me that appreciate my desire to be child-like, to be rejoicing my birthday, rather than bein listless bout it. My family taught me to laugh at the the lamest, most un-funniest jokes, my friends, consoling me to take a breather by treating me Sakae Sushi, buying a muffin to replace me a melted cake, pickin me up from work to chill with the rest and callin me up at work to wish me a lovely birthday! I dont care what gift they gave, but their time and love is all I need to restore that
child in me, so I wont be what I hate myself to be. True, ageing will cause you to mature.. focus more at work and in school, be impartial when making decisions and making critical judgements on important issues, but not to the extent of being listless. Thats a sure road to unhappiness....
I just returned from a chill out session with Lin, Beid, Nas , Fik and Ridz and the
homely feeling Ridz described was apt. I know these people will
catch my back. I do have a foreboding feelin that this
homeliness might end, but lookin at how far we have been thru together... it wont end in the near future, in God's will ;> Here is a listing of who wished me first on my birthday..as I listed for my previous birthday.. You will know the rational of such a listing at the end of this entry..
- Beidah, on the 26th cause she claimed Friendster annouced it on the 26th (excuses...)
- Nasri via sms
- JC via lunch at Sakae Sushi
- William Chua... aka Uncle William, wil be off to France soon ey! Have Fun Dude. He hope I will get a perfect job and a perfect dude, on my birthday.. Unfortunately... that didnt happen ;P
- Sameer, my TJ friend whom I met at Arabic class just recently, I knew his birthday is in July too ;) 25th.
- Taufik, my best bud who knows I remember his birthday, even if I didnt wish him, I miss the times we chill together.
- Lina, my best girl bud who taught me how to grow up faster.
- Chris, my FACT ex-colleague whom I enjoy being with when it comes to bitchin' ard ;)
- Claud, my cry buddy when things go wrong and bad guys have somethin to do bout it
- Mom and Dad, while I was on my way out to Arabic lessons. Mom gave me a hug, Dad didnt give me anything ;P
- Art, who gave me muffin cause my birthday cake melted in the car and gave me a CD which had the "sounds of the ocean" cause he cant bring me the sea.
- Zahdan, who obviously forgot it was my birthday, cause he was certainly the one of the last to wish me... So much for being best friends... ZZzzZZ
- My 2 favourite uncles; Pak Busu and Pak Andak. Mak Busu got me a brooch set, hopin I wld put on the tudung soon. He he! My sis invited them over for a surprised birthday party. My mom and sis got me an Adidas watch. Weeee! And we had a humble portion of peanut butter cake which obviously wasnt enough, cause it was sooooo NICE!
- Shahidah, who didnt know whether my birhday was on the 28 or 29.. hur hur... (excuses..)
- Rizwan who called all the way from Kuala Lumpur to wish me a Happy Birthday on a bright Saturday mornin :> I sure hope things are fine back in Kuala Lumpur. Take care Dude.
- Vivin, who found out from Fik when she met him at the fair today :) She apologised for forgettin my birthday when she called me @ work today. We are gonna be Granny Friends when we get older. Its a good thing we set next Saturday to chill after such a long long time.. I miss you Vivin ;)
- The peeps from the Kental Clique which included Beidah, Lina, Hashirin, Faridz, Nasri, Shikin, Taufik, Shahidah and Zahdan. They got me a pair of lovely earrings and a blue sha-na-na top. But most cherished was their company, BEST gift for the night :) I wanna thank Nasri for contemplating to surprise me at my house with my family yesterday night, nice of you dude. Hehe, I appreciate that guys...
- Johnny Suwarday, aka Johnny Boy. I tell you, who ever marries this dude will be ONE lucky girl. He darn fun and darn frank. Despite bein a lil on the shy and jaded side of life, he still make the best companion in sad lonely days. Give it up for Johnny Boy!
- Latha, my sweet old bud, ex-colleague from StarHub. Her birthday on the 26th July. I sortta look up to her cause she has this strong personality, gusto but feminine at the same time. And its something bout how she slurs her words, as if she had not a care in the world.
I love u guys all the same... whether you were the first or the last or the incidental ones to wish me. Cause you know why?? At this age and as you get older, there will be lesser number of people who really care for you personally.. Its just natural progression of life. Priorities change..And so Adults, naturally get more listless, more egoistic, more boring and certainly more cynnical as they go through life long experiences. One solid prove would be the comparision between the number of people who wished me on my 22th birthday and the 23th birthday.... I had 31 the last time round, but now its down almost 50%, despite me wishin more people on their birthdays this year! HAha!
Che Sera Sera... ;)
Myra Abd Kadir~ at 03:35
