Myra is ME

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

Caprice



i reserve sunday and monday nights for the tiny light box..nothin i like more than sniggering at the dudes i really fancy on the tele.. nothin cheesy bout that..

i get excited and engrossed, delightingly absorbing their persona into the world around me and welcome, but coyly dissolving myself into my fantasy to make them alive with me in it.. "Shamefully".... And then I get utterly disappointed when the light box suddenly turn up the music and flashes the credits, signalling the unwanted detachment. Suddenly I disapprove of father time being too forbidding.. Suddenly I lust for the impossible... Suddenly... in a surreal way.... Caprice....

I am in love... with 2 ficticious beings...
What an unexpectedly novelty.. for me to be in love...hur hur

Its somethin about him and how he works, his resourcefulness... his dead clear conscience...Its somethin about his determination to execute task which very few men can undertake..Its somethin about his dead clear shots he call, almost, every single time..Its somethin about his authority, which renders me vulnerable as I yield to his deadly cues...Cassanovic....Its somethin about his self-rightious being, but un-full of himself, where is betterment of others pleases him more than his own...Its somethin about his charisma which enlightens the people, especially the ladies around him.. They tempt him, and yes they do... but he almost never strays..Doesnt he lusts? He fantasizes? He craves?Ah yes... His dead clear conscience..Its somethin about his virility... which promises a redolent sanctuaryIts somethin about his wisdom which is unmatched by most around him, So wise is he, which makes the authority above him, humbly bows in appreciation However, all the thropies that mark his traits were humbly tucked deep inside, never once he took out to buff off the rust.

Without further ado..... ( I know I am tormenting you, the incidental reader with such unflavourable illustrations, which is possibly uncalled for and certainly unwanted details of my amorous fantasies)

Presenting.....
Las Vegas's Mike Cannon (James Lesure) and Grey's Anatomy Preston Burke (Isaiah Washington)
N.B. I am in love with their characters, and not them per se.

I shall write like a normal person now... It puzzles me why these two hot guys I really am obsessed with are both black and almost bald. Thats another story but ofcourse physique is one of the big factors to why I love these dudes. Hmmm... I guess I like guys are
  1. confident of not hiding their flaws..
  2. assertive, task-driven and charismatic
  3. are in touch with themselves as well as with others
  4. guys who are competitive yet fun-loving
  5. Suave yet decently menacing
  6. who are altruistic and compassionate
  7. who like they do and do darn well in it

And that job need not to be significant in my life, be it a surveillance agent looking out die-swappers in the Montecito or cardiothoracic specialist performing brain surgery in the OR. But the job has to scream 'professional coolness' for I adore men of authority. Of course altruism is somewhat rare in a men of such status, and don think I dont know that. And of course, sexual appeal comes without saying...

Well, frankly speaking, the roots of my caprice is my utter disappointment in the men I meet, so much so, I seek solace in ficticious men who are carefully crafted by clever scriptwriters. But James Lesure is a real person, isnt he. So these men are not so ficticious at all. I told Lina bout how this dude was not for me. Howeveer in the end she sounded as if I was dissing dip. holders. I dont diss them, I just prefer grads than dip holders, with all do respect. The troubling thing is,I dont know how it got to this topic anyway..... It wasnt meant to be taken personally. I just prefer a man to be superiour than me in terms of professional status. I do have a choice to see it in another way...

1) She might just feel I should keep my head out of the clouds by saying I am not deserving of those lads... My answer to that claim: "You dont think I am deserving of it?"
2) She might just think I am finicky and that the man that I seek exists only in Myra's Lala Land.My rebuttal will be: " Dont underestimate men. Low probablity does not mean impossibility"

But of course, we are chill with ourselves. I respect her views and she respects mine, with much difficulty though. I will not doubt my taste in men no matter how my girlbuds try to change it, for I truly believe such men exists, not to such perfection as character artists may portray them to be, but somewhat similar. Like I said James Lesure is real. I am certainly not hopin for one, cause I shun a life of bachelorette. Unfortunately, I just have a great feeling the guy I will end up with will be short off most of those characters I yearn from a man, (lets hope whoever the dude is does notstumble upon this blog, cause if he does.. he gets utterly demoralised and I will end up a spinster with a pet cat. Haha..) On the otherhand, he might just be up to the challenge ;) That is the real test of machismo... test of virility...test of courage?? Or are those men already married? But James Lesure is NOT ;)

In the good words of fellow mate, Wayne Soon," Dont expect anything...."

ironic ....

p.s. i don wanna be 23 so soon...

Myra Abd Kadir~ at 02:59

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